Reflections on simplicity in caregiving

For the purpose of this reflection, I'm going to focus on the concept of simplicity in my family caregiving role as opposed to the inevitable caregiving that comes with my work. When I think of the word "simplicity", I am referring to what it means to take time to clarify what is important and allowing the nonessentials fall away. I can say without a doubt that I have never been able to do this, but I think is something to strive for.

Often in my own role as a caregiver, I let my perception of what caregiving "should" look like cloud what could be. I've come up with endless reasons why a task has to be done a certain way, carried unrealistic expectations with me about a variety of things, and in particular, have allowed my sense of responsibility and modelling to guide my interactions. I have never simply just been myself in this role and have often wondered why that seems so impossible for me. Is it because of my view of this role? Or possibly because I don't believe that my true self will be seen by those I'm caring for, even if I showed myself? Or is it because when you're caring for someone whom you share love, it's too personal, too close? I have no idea what the answers are.

I wonder how much of myself would organically shine through if I simplified everything. For Mother's Day last weekend, I planned a tea for my mom and then arranged for us to paint clay mugs at a local art store. For as much time and effort that went into the tea, it wasn't necessary or even all that enjoyable. It was the painting where both my mom and I were able to let more of our true selves shine through together than has in years - and if I'd simplified everything in my planning, removed expectations and allowed simplicity to be enough, I would have seen that. There are so many other interactions I have with my parents in this role where I know the same would be true.

This is all just my own personal reflections and food for thought. I wonder how much time and energy we all would save ourselves if we invited more simplicity into our caregiving role. I wonder how many tasks would become easier, and our interactions more genuine and fun. This is something I plan to experiment with more.